Fucking Pissed

[imood mood at time of entry: pissed

It is as if being fine and peaceful are crimes against all that is right in the world. Finally, my life has found a way to suck just a little more. I had been in a pretty good mood for the past week or so, but yesterday (Monday, February 23, 2004) just messed everything up.

It started out OK, but then little things started to happen. I finished the final proofread of the first chapter of my Haldir fic and was going to post it yesterday at lunch. The Yahoo! PageBuilder opened but wouldn’t allow me to paste the story. I was pissed, but I thought “OK, this isn’t working right now because of the stupid school computer, I’ll do it later on at the public library.” Well, lo and behold the disk goes missing and I have lost a couple days work. I have absolutely no idea where the damned disk is. I didn’t save the work anywhere else because I only needed the disk. So now I’m out of all my hard work and I have to type the whole damn thing over again.

If that’s not enough to agitate me, I get to the library near my house later than expected and my holds are either not there as they should be or they are wrong. I had to maintain myself at this point because I came verrry close to throwing the tape at the librarian’s face. I had to tell myself that she didn’t make the mistake and that she was simply the messenger.

So, I checked out what I had available to me and stomped out of the library. I was already pissed when I went in because I discovered my missing disk. I had taken everything out of my backpack looking for it. I put everything that I took out (a dictionary, a thesaurus, my offline journal, my purse, and heaven knows what else) and put it on the dashboard. I threw all of that on the floor and the front seat so that my mom wouldn’t bitch at me about it being on the dashboard and sliding off.

I threw my wallet and the library checkouts on the floor and got it the back.

I will usually feel better if I read a favorite story or something, but not even that was available when I went to the library near my Aunt Precious’ house since it was open late Monday. I got to read a bunch of emails that were pouring in from my Yahoo! Group. They post too damn much!

After I walked home I got the wonderful “honor” of cleaning up her (my Aunt Percious) house and I was soaked through with sweat by the time that I finished. So here I was pissed, sweating, and having to deal with my grandmother’s need to ask every damn question that crosses her mind since she is no longer in adequate control of her mind anymore. She had two strokes and an aneurysm on the brain two and a half years ago. I seriously thought that I might explode at this point.

I figured that I left the disk at school and would come to get it. Well, there was this stupid TAKS testing and I showed up too early. I didn’t have to take the test since I passed TAAS, a yearly test used to decide promotion to the next grade and graduation in high school. It was replaced by TAKS, which is supposed to be a harder test. So I got here and had to wait around doing absolutely nothing for forty-five minutes except be hit on by disgusting people that I wanted to hit. Guh.

You would think, after all of that, the Universe would be nice to me, and let me get my disk, so I wouldn’t have to retype an entire chapter and lose my mind in the process. But since this is my life, it wasn’t. My disk is nowhere to be found and I am still here at Hell Central trying to wait until the last bell of the day.

*sighs*

I don’t really know what to do except be mad and hope that I don’t die of a heart attack from stress. I just can’t do this anymore.

Danielle