Catching Up
(4:56 P.M. – 5:26 P.M. US Central Time/Saturday/library near my aunt’s house)
[imood mood at time of entry: content]
I haven’t had a proper update for well over a week now. This pattern has definitely started to settle in. I don’t think that it’s so much that I don’t have anything to write about anymore, but that the focus of my writing has changed, and that people on this site are not interested in my newest obsession. There is also the problem of communties available within the journaling system here. I have been using my LiveJournal tons lately simply because I can post my stories there and get feedback.
I was rather distraught when I came by yesterday (Friday, October 1, 2004), and saw that I couldn’t get to the DD homepage. I did, however, come to my journal to see if my “baby” was all rght. I have over a year and a half of my life stored here, and I cannot casually let that go. But it seems that I am being drawn further into the LiveJournal vortex, since, I have recently purchased a six month membership there. I would love to buy a DD membership, but what exactly would I be getting?
Anyone who offeres me polls, gets me. It’s that simple. I am absolutely nuts about polls. DD offers me front page advertisement, which is helpful beyond words, but LiveJournal let’s me add all these neat little trinkets to my site. I love the little things that decorate my space (online or off) because it let’s me express more of the emotional me.
I never responded to my last comments, and I apologize for that. I have either been too sick lately, or didn’t have enough energy to come here and update. I’m going to address the last comments now.
Chaos: Thanks for the encouragement. You always give me a different angle with which to look at whatever situation I happen to be devastated about. I truly would love to just go up to girls and ask them out, but I usually do so in the casual way. That one, I didn’t even try. I am still kicking myself about her. Gorgeous I tell you!
I should go to the hospital, but frankly, I don’t have the money for it. Sure, I might be seen after waiting four or five hours (probably more), but they will send me the full bill. I can’t even cover my overdrawl fees right now, let lone several thousand dollars of hospital bills to save my life. Poor people just have to die. That’s not going to change in this country, sadly.
You’re correct about Life being a sort of magick in itself. It truly is, and I should enjoy it for what it’s worth. I do, to an extent, but I can’t help but dread what is to come. I don’t like the thought of not being in control. You know?
Zara: I would love to hear the Tibetian take on Life and Death. I have always felt it was important to analyze Death through another culture’s eyes. I will write down the title and look it up. I do try and divert my attention to something else. Actually, the most wonderful thing happens when I get overwhlemed with my thoughts of death. I’ll have to devote an entry to it sometime.
kharita: Thanks for stopping by again. I did go have a look see at those sites you mentioned. I especially liked the personal one by the woman who went through the different stages of Christianity.
All in all, thanks for caring. I have a bit of typing to do on my story so I can get it posted next week. I hate to keep my fans waiting for a new chapter. I know that I hate waiting for chapters too.
Sincerely,
Danielle
Hospitals are a last resort for me too. Even with the poor people’s insurance in my state I still have a copay for the hospital Look into the poor people’s insurance in your state if you have it and see if you qualify. Never hurts to take an asprin a day (preferably enteric coated 81mg). And like I said chew some up if you feel like that again.
My college has a class on death and dying which examines it from different cultural perspectives. I think it’s counted as a philosophy and religion class (catholic college). But if you get into a public school someday look into that or find a syllabus online from one of those classes and they probably have the books from it in the library.
I thinking seriously about moving myself to another diary site. I have a diary on another site but I don’t use it ever. But between all the stuff going on here with stuff working and not working all the time. And the snippy letter I got from the admin here because I asked a question that apparnatly had been asked before by other people but the answer never posted in the updates diary. I don’t see much point in me dropping cash into this site because I don’t want to pay $40 for a smiley face. I like the community but to me it’s still not worth it. There’s no bells and whistled for me to play with.